A collaboration between myself & a fantastic actor/humourist called Pete Hughes from Humourcide Entertainment.  A little insight into the world of the Black River – for those of you who’ve read the novels, meet Tollie….

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Up Close and Kind of Personal with…. J.W. Goodwin

Interviewed by LG Surgeson &

Clara Euphemista Cropper & Bread and Butter Pudding with Custard The Goblin aka as ‘The Amazing Bazooka Sisters’ 

Give us your name & any known aliases

J.W. Goodwin a.k.a Jessica

JW Goodwin

Summarise your bio in no more than 100 characters

 

 

I am the author of By the Light of a Darkened Forest and I was born in Northern Ontario, Canada where winters are long and summers are filled with construction. I grew up in a small town and spent many days on my grandparents’ farm, with no animals but a dog and 

 

cat I may add. That is where my love of adventure came from and where my imagination is rooted in. I still live up in the North and wouldn’t change it for the world.

Tell us about your current work?

I am currently in the middle of the first edit for the second instalment in my Love’s Choices series. To be more specific right now I’m drawing maps for it so I have a sense of direction to go in as well as help me get back into the story. Guess that’s what happens when I try to do too many things at once.

Have you got anything else out at the moment?

A short story of mine is included in Creativia’s first anthology Once Upon a Broken Dream named “It All Comes Down”. It’s about a young woman who’s having difficulty keeping her life together while living in a big city and leads to her inability to cope with life. Turns out I have a hard time writing happy things when given a writing prompt.

We know you’re a writer, what else do you do?

Many things, like breathing and eating for example, but a more serious answer would be I do artwork, play video games, and explore back roads when I have time.

Who’s your writing hero and why?

Is it bad if I say I don’t really know if I have one? I do love J.K. Rowlings Harry Potter series and she’s really the only author I’ve followed for a long time. I’ve never been much into books because it takes me forever to read them.

If you could have been the author of any book in history which one do you wish you’d written and why?

I would say Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowlings because I is my favourite in the series due to we first meet Sirius Black in it. He was my favourite character until she offed him. That was the most heart breaking moment I had while reading a book.

Tell us about your writing rituals – do you write in your Pjs, in your garden, in the pub or in the altogether?

I don’t really have a ritual but I know I need absolute quiet from the outside world or else I get distracted by the noises. Beyond that so long as I’m comfortable I could write anywhere. It’s the noises that kill my mojo and there’s plenty of that.

 

What makes you feel like a real author?

When someone tells me they loved my book. That’s when I feel like I made a difference to that person and it is what I think a good author should be doing. Unfortunately because I tend to be reclusive I don’t hear it often which can take a toll when you want to make people happy and have a great adventure.

What do your family think of your writing – be honest!

My parents are proud that I’ve found something that I love doing but are surprised that I chose writing. Honestly it surprises me too. I became an author from a kid who hated reading, and in some respects still does depending on what it is. So choosing to become an author was a shock to them.

What job did you want when you were 7 or 8 years old?

I don’t remember which but I was always torn between being a veterinarian and a school teacher. When I got older I learned being a vet was out of the question because I can’t stand the sight of blood (I get nauseous) and howling dogs make me very sad and I want to comfort them. As for the teacher, by the time I was nearly done high school I was told by a guidance counsellor I would have to go to university for 8 years and by that point I was kind of done having homework so that ended that career path.

Now take a deep breath! I’m going to hand you over to Clara and Pudding, who are going to take it from here – brace yourself, they’re easily amused.

Are you posh or wot?

Nope. I prefer living in the woods in a cabin wearing flannel during the winter. Just give me internet to do research and I’d never leave until I needed food.

What’s the longest word you can spell wiv out checkin’?

I don’t know to be honest. I just kind of write things.

‘ave you ever been harrested?

Nope

What da’ya wan’ on ya grave-stone?

My silly answer would be “Jessica was here”. For a more serious answer, wait till I’m dead, I’m sure someone would write something.

‘ave you ever used a gazunda?

What’s your favourite pie fillin’?

Apple, yum.

How do ya’ like it?

Like this interview? Like the world? Like my food? My toes? Like what?

Can ya sing and what songs do ya know?

I love to sing when I’m by myself and know many songs though not off by heart. Do I sing well… probably not.

What about folk dancin’ ‘ave you ever tried it and did you get injurered?

I probably did when I was younger but I don’t remember. No injuries though.

‘Do you ‘ave a party piece & what is it?

I don’t go out much so, no I don’t.

Would you like some of these apples…. what aren’t stolen, honest?

I love apples, sure! But if I get in trouble I’m blaming you.

{That’s fair – Clara}

Do you have a fab’lous hat?

I do. I have many hats but since I’m in between places right now I can’t show them because they’re packed away. Another time perhaps?

If someone gives you an empty collander, what do you do wiv it?

What’s your plan in the case of a zombie apocalypse?

Pray that I die quickly by any other means so I don’t become one. I can’t see me surviving an attack.

The shameless plugs

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JessicaWGoodwin/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/JessWGoodwin

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.ca/authorjwgoodwin/

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B01AKXEOP8

Creativia author page: http://www.creativia.org/dreams-storytelling-and-love-of-nature-ontario-author-jw-goodwin.html

Blog: https://authorjwgoodwin.wordpress.com

Buy links: http://mybook.to/ByTheLightOfADarkenedForest

Up Close and Kind of Personal with…. Lorelei Bell

Interviewed by LG Surgeson &

Clara Euphemista Cropper & Bread and Butter Pudding with Custard The Goblin aka as ‘The Amazing Bazooka Sisters’ 

Lorelei bellGive us your name & any known aliases

Lorelei Bell—the aliases you’ll have to ask the FBI.

{Lorelei is a pretty awesome name anyway…. – LG}

Summarise your bio in no more than 100 characters

Began writing @17, was rejected through the 80’d &90’s. I self-pubbed
SBU in 2008.

Tell us about your current work?

~2 YA murder mysteries (#2 of the Lainey Quilholt series is written and in 2nd draft, third one is my WIP)
~the next two Sabrina Strong (urban fantasy) books are written, last one needs to have work done, these will be out in the next year or two.
~1 stand-alone vampire/horror book that I’ve been working on for thepast 2 decades, and actually is derived from something I began in 1980.
~sequel to the Zofia Trickenbod fantasy, “Spell of the Black Unicorn”,
Spell of Dark Castle” is with my publisher.

.Have you got anything else out at the moment?

1,2,3,4, 5 & #6 in Sabrina Strong has just come out.

We know you’re a writer, what else do you do?

In the warm months, I garden, have interests in nature and outdoors. But I write as the day gets warm/hot. I’m also an artist, I’ve been working in watercolors. I do have a day job.

Who’s your writing hero and why?

I think I’d have to say JK Rowling, because she never gave up, she loved and believed in what she was doing. 

{I would agree with you – LG}

If you could have been the author of any book in history which one do you wish you’d written and why?

I’ve never thought of it, actually. And if there were something, like, say “Dracula”, perhaps.
I would have written it differently.
How? 
Well, I think Dracula should have gotten the woman.

Tell us about your writing rituals – do you write in your Pjs, in your garden, in the pub or in the altogether?

Hey, I’m a comfort lover and sweats or comfy shorts are my preference. I do have an office, and sit at a desk. My computer is 10 years old.  I’d rather write in the early morning, but can’t because of my regular job. But I manage to squeeze in a few hours in the afternoon.

Do you ever get irritated with your own main characters?

Yes…when they go off on a tangent doing their own thing, and muggins here is simply being a reporter relaying what they’re doing instead of ordering them about.

What makes you feel like a real author?

Each time my new paperback comes out and I hold it in my hand.

Would you prefer to be a literary great or a cult hero?

A literary great. I know my writing isn’t great literature, and while my readers tell me I’m a half-passable entertaining storyteller, it would be good to be up there with the greats.

When it comes to language do you have a pet hate?

Too many, really. I don’t like lazy language, or the word “like” used every other word. Or for that matter someone using foul language (although I do an awful lot of it when I’m pissed off) too often, unless it’s a character trait.

When did you first realise you had a story to tell?

I used to do cartoons, and then realized words would tell the story faster/better. I think I might have been 16.

What makes you feel like a real author?

I had a couple of book signings at my local Borders, and it went great. I loved it!

What do your family think of your writing – be honest!

I know they have bought/read my books, come to my book signings, and my older sister, when she writes to me, puts “Author” behind my name on the envelope. They all were very accepting and excited about it.

Now take a deep breath! I’m going to hand you over to Clara and Pudding, who are going to take it from here – brace yourself, they’re easily amused.

castle on a cliff Lorelei BellAre you posh or wot?

Me? I don’t think so. Unless you count my palace in Transylvania.

What’s the longest word you can spell wiv out checkin’?

Transylvania. It usually surprises me that I can spell at all.

‘ave you ever been harrested?

Harrested for what?

What da’ya wan’ on ya grave-stone?

I won’t have one, dear. Just want my ashes spread somewhere beautiful and peaceful.

‘ave you ever used a gazunda?

Please, you’re embarrassing me.

{Sorry guv’nor – Clara,  Yeah, whatever – Pudding…… Shut up you two – LG}

What’s your favourite pie fillin’?

apple, cherry, blueberry, pumpkin, chocolate….

How do ya’ like it?

On a plate with a fork and napkin.

Can ya sing and what songs do ya know?

I can’t, and usually don’t

What about folk dancin’ ‘ave you ever tried it and did you get injurered?

At my age, it might injure my knees. I’m a wallflower.

‘Do you ‘ave a party piece & what is it?

?????  {Now I’m intrigued…. Clara}

Would you like some of these apples…. what aren’t stolen, honest?

I’ll buy my own. Thanks.

Do you have a fab’lous hat?

I actually have a number of hats. I’ll see if I can’t dig one picture out for you.

{Not completely sure if any of them are a fab’lous though…-Pudding}

What’d be worse one twelve foot mole, or twelve moles with only one foot?

I’d like to see either. The other day I had to clean up basement and found one dead mouse and a live baby mouse. How the baby got there I haven’t a clue.

{If she don’t know how that baby mouse got there, she needs to visit the Life Temple – Pudding… Shut up Pudding – LG}

If someone gives you an empty collander, what do you do wiv it?

Probably clean grapes or some broccoli crowns in it.

What’s your plan in the case of a zombie apocalypse?

Ah, a really good question. I’d set my stun gun on kill. Easy peasy.

The shameless plugs

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lorelei.bell1?ref=profile

Twitter: https://twitter.com/loreleibell

Amazon author page: https://authorcentral.amazon.com/gp/profile

Publisher’s author pagehttps://www.facebook.com/lorelei.bell1?ref=profile

Lorelei’s Muse: https://loreleismuse-lorelei.blogspot.com/

Buy links:

Spell of the Black Unicorn”

Ascension” Book #1:

“Party to a Murder” Lainey Quilholt Mystery book 1

Up Close and Kind of Personal …with Simone Beaudelaire

with LG Surgeson &

Clara Euphemista Cropper & Bread and Butter Pudding with Custard The Goblin

aka as ‘The Amazing Bazooka Sisters’ .

22850170_483349738714844_263280545_oGive us your name & any known aliases

My writing name is Simone Beaudelaire but in that mystical place called Real Life, I’m called Kat

Summarise your bio in no more than 100 characters

The relationship screw-up writes her way out of a bad spot and finally gets it right.

Tell us about your current work?

My current work is a dark paranormal western historical romance called Devilfire. It tells the story of a small-town Texas doctor who gets himself in over his head while cleaning up after a suspicious fire and running into the strangest – and most intriguing – woman he has ever met.Simone Beaudelaire

Have you got anything else out at the moment?

I have about twenty romance novels available on Amazon. I do paranormal, historical and contemporary, as the mood strikes me.

We know you’re a writer, what else do you do?

I teach English at a small community college in the Midwestern United States.

Who’s your writing hero and why?

Mary Jo Putney. She proves that romance doesn’t have to be sappy or formulaic. It can be powerful, hard-hitting, emotional and real.

If you could have been the author of any book in history which one do you wish you’d written and why?

Eh, I’m having more fun writing as me.

Tell us about your writing rituals – do you write in your Pjs, in your garden, in the pub or in the altogether?

Every morning I wake up at stupid thirty and try to psych myself up to write but end up staring at Facebook instead. However, after a nearly year-long hiatus at the end of my pregnancy and after the birth of my baby, I’m happy to be writing at all.

When it comes to language do you have a pet hate?

I hate… German. Actually, no, not really. I don’t like gratuitous vulgarity. If it fits, fine. If not, leave it out

When did you first realise you had a story to tell?

I’ve always known. I’ve been imagining myself in romantic or adventurous scenarios since I was a kid.

What makes you feel like a real author?

Who says I do? 

What do your family think of your writing – be honest!

My husband loves and supports my writing. My kids are okay with it. My extended family is somewhat embarrassed of me.

 

Now take a deep breath! I’m going to hand you over to Clara and Pudding, who are going to take it from here – brace yourself, they’re easily amused.

Are you posh or wot?

Posh? Who me? Nah. I have four kids. No time for posh

What’s the longest word you can spell wiv out checkin’?

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. {spot on! -LG}

‘ave you ever been harrested?

I’m too boring for that.

What da’ya wan’ on ya grave-stone?

She helped some folks and entertained others. Her kids grew up well.

‘ave you ever used a gazunda?

XXXX awaiting follow up. 

What’s your favourite pie fillin’?

Cherry. I make it myself.

How do ya’ like it?

The pie filling? In pie of course.

Can ya sing and what songs do ya know?

Singing is my other hobby. I like Renaissance-era motets and madrigals.

{I thought she said she weren’t posh!! – Clara.}

What about folk dancin’ ‘ave you ever tried it and did you get injurered?

American folk dancing, and no, I managed not to get hurt.

Would you like some of these apples…. what aren’t stolen, honest?

Are they Macintosh? 

Do you have a fab’lous hat? 

Hats make my nose look big.

{You know what they say about big noses don’t ya? – Pudding. Shut up Pudding – Clara}

What’d be worse one twelve foot mole, or twelve moles with only one foot?

Ugh. None of the above, but if you want to talk about giant moles, my husband wrote about one, I think.

If someone gives you an empty collander, what do you do wiv it?

Make spaghetti. 

What’s your plan in the case of a zombie apocalypse?

Sit and wait. I’m too fat to run and too lazy to start the whole world over again

The shameless plugs

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simone.beaudelaire.5

https://www.facebook.com/Simone-Beaudelaire-and-Edwin-Stark-703991259648857/

Amazon author page:

https://www.amazon.com/Simone-Beaudelaire/e/B00CIUPNWK/ref=sr_tc_2_0?qid=1507841990&sr=8-2-ent

Creativia page: https://www.creativia.org/romance-author-simone-beaudelaire.html

Buy links:

http://mybook.to/AmorMaldito
http://mybook.to/AmorMalditoES
http://mybook.to/TheNaphilsKiss
http://mybook.to/WhenTheMusicEnds
http://mybook.to/whenthewordsarespoken
http://mybook.to/whentheheartheals
http://mybook.to/CarolinesChoice
http://mybook.to/HeartsInWinter
http://mybook.to/HighPlainsHoliday
http://mybook.to/highplainspromise
http://mybook.to/highplainsheartbreak
http://mybook.to/highplainspassion
http://mybook.to/SavingSam
http://mybook.to/JustifyingJack
http://mybook.to/MakingMike
http://mybook.to/WoundedWarriors
http://mybook.to/VictorianRomance
http://mybook.to/DevinsDilemma
http://mybook.to/baylee
http://mybook.to/Xaman
http://mybook.to/PolarHeat
http://mybook.to/WatchingOverTheWatcher
http://mybook.to/SisterhoodOfFear
http://mybook.to/EchoesOfTheGrave

http://mybook.to/BloodFever

Up Close and Kind of Personal …with Marnie Cate

with LG Surgeson &

Clara Euphemista Cropper & Bread and Butter Pudding with Custard The Goblin

aka as ‘The Amazing Bazooka Sisters’ .

Give us your name & any known aliases

Marnie hat

Marnie and her Fab’lous Hat! 

Marnie Cate

Summarise your bio in no more than 100 characters

Marnie Cate was born in mining town in Montana. Inspired by the spirit of actress Dame Judi Dench, she pursued her dream of sharing the stories brewing in her mind. With the urging of friends and family, she wrote in every spare moment she had.


After countless weekends spent at the local coffee shop typing away and people watching, Marnie finished her first novel in the Protectors of the Elemental Magic series. The world of elemental magic and the humans they lived has been released and their stories have just begun.

Tell us about your current work?

I am currently working on three stories for the Protectors of the Elemental Magic series starting with Meg’s Winter (Book 5). Also, I am revising Beginnings, the novella explaining the need to protect the magic. The second novella is Kinema’s Destiny; the mother earth tale of the origin of the magic. Leaving my Coming of Age Fantasy series, I am expanding the short story the Chase that had been written for a Winter Anthology. The story of Caitlyn Whitaker demands to be told.

Have you got anything else out at the moment?

I have four books in the Protectors of the Elemental Magic Series.

We know you’re a writer, what else do you do?

I am an administrative assistant for my pay job.

Who’s your writing hero and why?

Jennifer Estep. She weaves not only fantastic stories but believable characters that you miss as soon as the last page turns.

If you could have been the author of any book in history which one do you wish you’d written and why?

There are so many I could never name one honestly!

Tell us about your writing rituals – do you write in your Pjs, in your garden, in the pub or in the altogether?

My favorite place to write is in a coffee shop but honestly, I have no preferred setting. Just need my laptop and a semi quiet place.

Do you ever get irritated with your own main characters?

All of the time. The characters won’t wait their turn. Their stories keep forcing themselves into my mind — all hours of the day.

What makes you feel like a real author?

Seeing my books available for purchase.

What do your family think of your writing – be honest!

Those that have read the stories love it.

What job did you want when you were 7 or 8 years old?

Solid Gold Dancer. I loved their big hair and leggings.

If you could spend one day as any literary character who would it be and why?

Alexia Tarabotti from Gail Carriger’s Parasol Protectorate series. I would love to visit 19th Century England that has werewolves and vampires integrated into society. Hopefully, we would have tea with Lord Akeldama.

{Good choice – I loved her Finishing School YA series _LG}

Now take a deep breath! I’m going to hand you over to Clara and Pudding, who are going to take it from here – brace yourself, they’re easily amused.

Are you posh or wot?

Definitely not

What’s the longest word you can spell wiv out checkin’?

What a silly question. I am sure I can spell more words but Mississippi comes to mind.

‘ave you ever been harrested?

Never! I am an upstanding citizen.

What da’ya wan’ on ya grave-stone?

It’s too late to apologize ~Marnie Cate

‘ave you ever used a gazunda?

Definitely not!

What’s your favourite pie fillin’?

Chocolate silk

How do ya’ like it?

Hot and with cream and sugar

Can ya sing and what songs do ya know?

Everyone can sing. The list is long.

What about folk dancin’ ‘ave you ever tried it and did you get injurered?

Tried and lived

‘Do you ‘ave a party piece & what is it?

I can tie my hair in a knot. People are fascinated by it 😉

Would you like some of these apples…. what aren’t stolen, honest?

They look a bit mealy

{suit ya sel’ more for us – Pudding} 

Do you have a fab’lous hat? 

Of course!

What’d be worse one twelve foot mole, or twelve moles with only one foot?

Twelve moles…those poor creatures.

If someone gives you an empty collander, what do you do wiv it?

Shove it in a cupboard.

What’s your plan in the case of a zombie apocalypse?

Die quickly before I am turned.

The shameless plugs

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarnieCate

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Marnie_Cate

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/Marnie-Cate/e/B00UJNT7J8/

Creativia author page: http://www.creativia.org/marnie-cate.html

Blog/Website/podcasts: http://www.marniecate.com

Vlog: http://www.marniecate.com/indie-insight.html

youtube channel: http://www.youtube.com/c/MarnieCate 

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/Marnie_Cate

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/authormarniecate

Buy links:

Up Close and Personal with…. Sarah Marie Graye

Interviewed by LG Surgeson

TW: Suicide, Mental Health & related content.

Give us your name & any known aliasesSarahMarieGraye

Sarah Marie Graye – no aliases

Summarise your bio in no more than 100 characters

A depression sufferer who wants to ‘show’ mental health to those who have never experienced it.

Tell us about your current work?

My debut novel is called ‘The Second Cup’. It’s literary fiction/women’s contemporary fiction. It follows the lives of four friends and watches how their worlds unravel when someone they know commits suicide. I think that when someone decides to take their own life, it brings things into focus for other people – and ‘The Second Cup’ looks at the changes the characters make to their lives as a result. It was released in July 2017 and is currently available for the Amazon Kindle. It will be out in paperback soon – it’s with the Creativia design team.

Have you got anything else out at the moment?

No – ‘The Second Cup’ is my first novel. I’m currently working on my second one though. I hope to have it written for release in 2018 – but I’ve probably cursed myself by admitting it!

When did you first realise you had a story to tell?

I’ve always had stories in my head. I daydream a lot and create characters and conversations in my head. Writing it down seemed like the obvious next step. I write first-person multi-narration and like being able to get inside the heads of my different characters and experience their lives.

We know you’re a writer, what else do you do?

I work in Marketing. My dream – as with every novelist I’m sure – is to one day give it up and be a full time writer.

What job did you want when you were 7 or 8 years old?

I’m not sure. I can remember wanting to be a children’s TV presenter when I was younger than that. Well, specifically, I wanted to be Floella Benjamin, who presented ‘Play School’. I was ridiculously upset when I found out you couldn’t turn into someone else when you grew up.

Who’s your writing hero and why?

Maggie O’Farrell, because she’s able to skilfully paint many different layers to her characters. They’re so well rounded and believable – I feel I get to know them as people.

If you could have been the author of any book in history which one do you wish you’d written and why?

After You’d Gone’ by Maggie O’Farrell – it’s the first book I’d ever read that broke my heart.

What makes you feel like a real author?

I still don’t! I’m hoping that will change when I first hold a paperback copy of my book in my hands. I’ve been longlisted for the Book Viral 2017 Millennium Book Award and the Online Book Club 2017 Book of the Year Award, which has helped it feel more real.

Tell us about your writing rituals – do you write in your Pjs, in your garden, in the pub or in the altogether?

My favourite time to write is between 11.30pm and 4am. It means my writing is often restricted to weekends because those hours don’t fit very well alongside work. The other time I write is after having a bath – I find ideas that have been knocking around my brain for a few days often formulate more clearly for me when I have no other distractions. I have been known to jump out of the bath in order to write a section of a chapter.

Would you prefer to be a literary great or a cult hero?

I’d never want a book I’d written to be dissected in the classroom because I think this is how you destroy a story; so I’d have to go for cult hero.

Twitter: https://twitter.com/SarahMarieGraye

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/author/sarahmariegraye

Creativia/Publisher’s author page: http://www.creativia.org/author-sarah-marie-graye.html

Buy links: https://mybook.to/SecondCup

Up Close and Personal with …. David Melville Edwards

with LG Surgeson &
Clara Euphemista Cropper &
Bread and Butter Pudding with Custard The Goblin
aka as ‘The Amazing Bazooka Sisters’ .
Note: all answers are the unedited responses of the author. This interview contains language which may offend the faint of heart – feel free not to read it.

Give us your name & any known aliases

David Melville Edwards, DME headshot
Fred Wildebeest (my first hotmail address).

Summarise your bio in no more than 100 characters

Mongrel British Computer Man and Author with 4 children, 2 grand children, still on first wife.

Tell us about your current work

The Spirit of the Age’ , a satirical metaphysical contemporary fantasy, is currently available on the Kindle, or as hard copy by arrangement with its publisher or author.

Have you got anything else out at the moment?

No.

We know you’re a writer, what else do you do?

I write software and test and troubleshoot computer systems with large numbers (thousands to millions) of users.

Who’s your writing hero and why?

Terry Pratchett. He was very productive, often very funny, always humane, and published hardly any duds. He will be sadly missed.

[A man after my own heart – this is almost exactly my answer to this question… RIP Sir TP x – LG]

If you could have been the author of any book in history which one do you wish you’d written and why?

Definitely ‘The Bible’. Just think of all those royalties!

Tell us about your writing rituals – do you write in your Pjs, in your garden, in the pub or in the altogether?

I write where I work at my day job; reclining on a lounger with a laptop on my lap. Dog gnawing my arm optional.

When it comes to language do you have a pet hate?

Overdone ‘Elegant Variation’, e.g. said/spoke/intoned/muttered/uttered …

What’s your favourite word/or words and why?

Fuck’. It’s so flexible and expressive, saves thinking time, and mostly conjures up happy memories. Unfortunately taboo limits its literary outings.

What’s your favourite book and why?

Mikhail Bulgakov’s ‘The Master and Margarita’. I first read it at the height of the Cold War, and I was struck by its depiction of a Russia that was neither a Workers’ Paradise nor the Evil Empire; just another place where people like me lived and worked. But its blend of the fantastical and the mundane with drama, humour and philosophising has stayed with me and inspired my own efforts.

When did you first realise you had a story to tell?

I’ve loved reading ever since I was able to do so, and I’d always wanted to write. I get bored if I’m not ‘doing things’. I started writing a novel soon after I finished University, but felt that my life experience was too limited to make it interesting. However, all my working life I have had to write reports on what I do. The subject matter is often rather dry, so I would amuse myself livening it up with inappropriate shifts of register. These would sometimes get me into trouble. For example, when I suggested that only the most self-flagellistic Operations Manager would continue on the current path. Actually writing the novel crept up on me, but I found my software development skills transferable. One year after I started, there it was.

Do you ever get irritated with your own main characters?

No. I’m by nature tolerant and my plotting is character-driven, so my characters follow their natural instincts. I could no more be upset by the sun coming up in the morning when I feel like staying in bed.

What makes you feel like a real author?

Seeing the book on the Kindle, all 400 pages of it, sharing the device with Charles Dickens’s ‘Bleak House’!

What do your family think of your writing – be honest!

They are unremittingly hostile. “You spent a year writing a novel? Why haven’t you written a killer software app!”

If you were a superhero what would your name and power be, what colour would your costume be and if you had a sidekick what would their name be?

I have a super-power, or so I’m told; acid from my fingers eats through computer keyboards. When working at weekends on tricky assignments, I used to wear a Batman T-shirt, until my children grew big enough to pinch it. My ideal side-kick would be hardworking, brilliant enough to always exceed my expectations, self-effacing and cheap! So that would be “CheapSelfEffacingBrilliantPerson”.

What job did you want when you were 7 or 8 years old?

I wanted to be an archaeologist. The dream died when I realised that it wasn’t supposed to be about treasure hunting. Though I now hope to take up detectoring.

Would you prefer to be a literary great or a cult hero?

Definitely a Literary Great. Getting paid to spout bollocks on TV and Radio beats earning a living!

If you could spend one day as any literary character who would it be and why?

Any member of PG Wodehouse’s ‘Drones Club’. I’d be able to devote my time to anything that took my fancy whilst all my physical needs were taken care of. Not that I’m lazy or anything …

Now take a deep breath! I’m going to hand you over to Clara and Pudding, who are going to take it from here – brace yourself, they’re easily amused.

Are you posh or wot?

Only the REALLY posh wouldn’t consider me posh; son of a senior army officer, cut glass accent, friends in high places, hob-nobbing with Peers of the Realm at weddings, cousin a cabinet minister …

{wow – that really is posh…. maybe we shuda washed? ….. Shut up Clara….}

What’s the longest word you can spell wiv out checkin’?

Antidisestablishmentarianism

‘ave you ever been harrested?

I picked up a £5 fine for cycling without lights, back in an age when the Police had nothing better to do

What da’ya wan’ on ya grave-stone?

I never wanted to be late …”

‘ave you ever used a gazunda?

Does taking them off count?

What’s your favourite pie fillin’?

Bramley Apple

How do ya’ like it?

As a crumble, with real egg custard

Can ya sing and what songs do ya know?

Yes, I’m a Tenor in a choir. We’ll be doing Bach’s Christmas Oratorio on 16th December 2017 at Reading University Great Hall.
See
http://www.wokingham-choral-society.org.uk/ for more details!

{Bloody Nora Clara…. he is posh! … Shut up Pudding.}

What about folk dancin’ ‘ave you ever tried it and did you get injurered?

Yes. At University I joined a Folk Dancing club in a vain attempt to meet girls. I didn’t get injured, but neither did I get laid. I was useless!

‘Do you ‘ave a party piece & what is it?

Singing ‘Sixteen Tons’, the song made famous by Tennessee Ernie Ford, a capella.

Would you like some of these apples…. what aren’t stolen, honest?

As long as they’re Bramleys, Russets, Galas or Coxes.

Do you have a fab’lous hat? hatless DME

I have two; an Akubra, and a leather ‘Indiana Jones’-type effort from South Africa.

I’ve lost my Indiana Jones hat at this point …

What’d be worse one twelve foot mole, or twelve moles with only one foot?

The twelve one-footed moles; they wouldn’t even be able to function as Golden or Marsupial Moles 😦

If someone gives you an empty colander, what do you do wiv it?

Strain the flour for my white sauce through it.

What’s your plan in the case of a zombie apocalypse?

Hide in plain site. I doubt that the zombies would be able to tell that I wasn’t one of them.

The shameless plugs

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheSpiritNovels

Twitter: https://twitter.com/DavidCreativia

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/David-Edwards/e/B01N6QCRG8

Creativia author page: http://www.creativia.org/david-melville-edwards.html

youtube channel: I don’t use it. But there is https://video.twimg.com/tweet_video/DLDWZAtWAAckVJH.mp4

Buy links: http://mybook.to/TheSpiritOfTheAge

Up Close and Kind of Personal…with Mari Collier

with LG Surgeson &
Clara Euphemista Cropper & Bread and Butter Pudding with Custard The Goblin
aka as ‘The Amazing Bazooka Sisters’ .

Give us your name & any known aliases22471523_10212479642684306_342735677_n

Marilyn J. Collier

Mari Collier

Summarise your bio in no more than 100 characters

I was born in Iowa, lived in Phoenix, Northwestern Washington, and now in a quirky, high desert town called Twentynine Palms. I’ve been a wife, mother, bookkeeper, collector, Super Advanced Agent for Nintendo of America, and now an author.

Tell us about your current work?

The Silver and The Green, Book 2 Chronicles of Tonath was just published. It’s a tale of the planet Tonath and its culture which makes it a work of science fiction. Three people struggle to find their Pathway in a wild province of their world.  One is a Seeker of knowledge and old legends. One seeks the family wealth, and one seeks a way to ease the sufferings she has seen. One will become the new Teacher for all of Tonath, one will begin her dream of rescuing the older, destitute women on the planet, and one will give his life to save the others. In the course of their journey, there are fights, wars, raids, and a fight for survival in a wild land. Grant Vidal the leader of the Green Marauders will interfere with their plans.

Have you got anything else out at the moment?

There are seven other novels. One is Book 1 of the Chronicles of Tonath and the other are Books 1 through 6 of the Chronicles of the Maca. All are #scifi, adventure, and a family saga of aliens and Earth beings which means love, romance, and sex are not slighted either. There are four anthologies of Twisted Tales written by someone who looks at the world at a different angle.

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We know you’re a writer, what else do you do?

I’m always a glutton for punishment and a history buff so I volunteer at the Old Schoolhouse Museum, I’m on the Twentynine Palms Historical Society’s Board of Directors, and write two columns for their Old Schoolhouse Journal.

Who’s your writing hero and why?

Really a difficult question. There are Will and Ariel Durant for the outstanding historical volumes, the Story of Civilization, Zenna Henderson for her series on The People, Frank Herbert for the Dune Series, and, of course, the incomparable Shirley Jackson.

If you could have been the author of any book in history which one do you wish you’d written and why?

 Caesar and Christ by Will Durant. It is the best book I have ever read.

Tell us about your writing rituals – do you write in your Pjs, in your garden, in the pub or in the altogether?

I tend to do all the physical work first. Yard work, house cleaning, shopping, laundry etc. Then there is the promo work online. That means I’m at the keyboard between 2:30 and 4:00 p.m.

Do you ever get irritated with your own main characters?

Not really, although Red O’Neal can be upsetting at times.

What makes you feel like a real author?

When someone thanks me for writing a certain novel. Don’t laugh. It has happened.

What do your family think of your writing – be honest!

My son was shocked, shocked, I tell you, that HIS mother wrote such a book. My daughter won’t read my novels because as she says, “I know my mother.” My one granddaughter is a doll. She loves my books and even wrote a review on my anthologies. I treasure that one. I have been told one great niece has all of them, but do not know if she has read any.

Would you prefer to be a literary great or a cult hero?

Cult hero would be great! I could wave at all my fans.

Now take a deep breath! I’m going to hand you over to Clara and Pudding, who are going to take it from here – brace yourself, they’re easily amused.

Are you posh or wot?

 I grew up on a farm without electricity or an indoor bathroom. Posh isn’t my style.

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Mari outside the back porch of the farm where she grew up.

What’s the longest word you can spell wiv out checkin’?

I refuse to answer on grounds that it may incriminate me. Spell Check has forever ruined my spelling ability.

‘ave you ever been harrested?

That puzzled me, but realized you weren’t using German so I went to the Urban dictionary. The answer is “no.” The only time I was stopped by a policeman (for driving too fast), he smiled and gave me a verbal warning.

What da’ya wan’ on ya grave-stone?

Here lies a child of God

‘ave you ever used a gazunda?

Okay, I’ll admit that I had to look that one up. We called it a thunder mug. I was surprised to learn the polite term was chamber pot. In the cold of winter with outhouse outside, far away from the house, of course, I’ve used one.    

(‘herherher… thunder mug…. herherher’ – Pudding)

What’s your favourite pie fillin’?

Apples, cinnamon, nutmeg, cream, and butter.

How do ya’ like it?

Fresh out of the oven or cold.

Can ya sing and what songs do ya know?

That may be debatable, but I sing quite loudly. I know the hymns I’ve been singing since I was three, a few folksongs, spirituals, and, of course, I once belted out Heartbreak Hotel.

What about folk dancin’ ‘ave you ever tried it and did you get injurered?

I’ve square danced and have done the polka (that’s folk dancing, isn’t it?), but beyond that I stuck to the two-step, the waltz, and oh, yeah, there was a time when I rocked ‘nd rolled. No injuries from any.

‘Do you ‘ave a party piece & what is it?

I have become rather dull without my husband, so the answer is no.

Would you like some of these apples…. what aren’t stolen, honest?

As long as they aren’t horse apples, I’m game.

Do you have a fab’lous hat?

Alas, all of my hats went the way of fashion along with the gloves.

What’d be worse one twelve foot mole, or twelve moles with only one foot?

Either way it’s an invasion. Man the ramparts.

If someone gives you an empty collander, what do you do wiv it?

Give it to my daughter-in-law. She still cooks pasta, I don’t.

What’s your plan in the case of a zombie apocalypse?

Get out the rifle and ammunition and shoot them in the head. Then wake up when the alarm goes off and write down the main points of the story. I never figured out why people like or watch that.

The shameless plugs

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Twisted-Tales-From-A-Skewed-Mind-124947397618599/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/child7mari

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/MariCollier/e/B00BGTT09Q/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

Creativia author page: http://www.creativia.org/twisted-tales-and-scifi-westerns-from-twentynine-palms-author-mari-collier.html

Website: http://maricollier.com/ 

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4618494.Mari_Collier/blog

Buy links: The Amazon Author Page has all my books. Barnes & Noble doesn’t have and Author Page so this is as close as it can be: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/books++mari+collier